Writing isn’t as easy as they make it out to be.
Writing. Is. Hard. I said it. For someone who is trying to launch her very own blog about all things literature and lifestyle, that doesn’t really make sense for me to say. But the point of Turning Page is to tell you the truth about life and the way it goes.
I could not put into words the excitement I felt when I finally put my foot down and made the decision to start a blog, after years of wanting to do so. A sense of pride took over for myself for taking the reigns and tossing my care of what other people may think to the wind. I told myself, I can do this, I can make something for myself, and I meant it.
All of that pride and excitement ran out a month ago. I was pumping out two blog posts a week, making a foundation for the blog, when all of a sudden the flow just… stopped. I would sit in front of a blank screen for hours, searching for words to fill a page and could not find any. That’s not to say I lost interest in all of my creative outlets, because I was still devouring books in a matter of days while I lacked the words to write.
Facing the reality of how I felt
It took me some time to realize that how I was feeling, the tasks I was avoiding, were all a product of myself. Somehow, innately, I began to convince myself that what I had to say was not important and nobody would listen anyway. Why did this come as a surprise to me? I have no idea. I’ve had a nasty habit of believing such things of myself for my whole life.
Even after coming to this realization, it still took me a while to open up WordPress and check in on my blog. I saw that my stats were all down, and felt a sinking feeling in my stomach. Why did I let myself give up for so long? The growth I was reaching for had all washed away, left me to start over new. It wasn’t the lack of growth that made me feel the worst; it was that I allowed myself to let go for weeks.
What they don’t tell you about the blogging world
When I was first starting out, I scoured the internet for any help or tips I could find. I read so many how-to blogs, and watched an absurd amount of videos. All of them boiled down to essentially the same point: you have to churn out content to be successful. I hate that word. Content. When did my ability to create something to share with the world turn into content? Something to be consumed by the world, chewed up and spit out in a matter of seconds?
I tried to keep up with acting as a factory, pushing out blog posts twice weekly. In all reality, I didn’t even have that much to say in that short span of time every week. I couldn’t even read enough books in a week to start forming an opinion or review of them. I was scrambling to find something to say, with a whole list of post ideas but no words to create them.
It was within my pause from the blog when I had my realization. I’m not here to make a name for myself on the internet, nor am I seeking widespread recognition by any means. I just want a place to call my own, my little corner, where I can say what I want and share it with others who feel the same.
What my next steps will be
I am back, and actively trying to resume my writing and blogging. Instead of posting twice a week, I have changed my pace for now and will be trying to post once weekly. My attendance may not always be perfect, and my writing might not always be of the best nature, but I will be trying. That is what is most important to me.
Check out my latest posts:
- January Reading Wrap Up
- The Best Mulled Wine Recipe for the Holiday Season
- How to Start a Blog (and Get Over Your Fears)
- 15 Travel Essentials That You Can’t Live Without
- Book Review: Verity by Colleen Hoover
- How to Read More Books in a Year
Click here for more from my lifestyle archive.